UPDATE – THE SCRIPT

Below in the comments, Greg Bulmash asked a great question about how exactly TL and I work together.  Specifically, he was curious as to how much influence I, as the writer, have over the visuals and how much is TL’s invention.

I figure some of you might like to know as well and the best way to answer that question is to simply show you what it was I handed TL.  Here, then, is the script to the page you see above.  I’ll follow up with some comments afterwards:

Page 1: This is the interrogation page.  I reference the Dark Knight scene in panel 3, but if you have the Killing Joke, it would be worth pulling that out as well.  Lots of interrogation stuff in the beginning of that book.

1- At the end of a darkened hallway the Money Man stands in front of a large iron door with his back to us. In his right hand is a piece of laminated paper he flashes at the two guards posted at the door.

GUARD 1
No admittance.

MONEY MAN
Take it up with
J. Edgar.

GUARD 1
…very well.

2- The credits box all by itself. It doesn’t have to be the same size and shape as the one in Money Man’s Origin, I just want to get the credits in its own space.

TITLES and CREDITS
Th3rd World Studios
Presents
SuperFogeys Origins
The Society of Heroes

Words – Brock Heasley
Art – T.L. Collins

3 – Widescreen above shot of the Money Man now on the other side of the door. He holds in his hands an open file which he is reading from.  The room is small, cold and sterile.  Think of the interrogation room in The Dark Knight: http://poplicks.com/images/dark-knight-interrogation.jpg. Love that metal table.  At the table sits Spy Gal. She is young, thin but still full-bodied.  Her hair has that single white streak (http://www.th3rdworld.com/web-comic/The-SuperFogeys/episode/86-WebSpace-Page-Jerry), but it’s ratty and fallen in her face.  We can just see one of her eyes peeking through the strands. She wears a gray jumpsuit with a zipper front, a zipper she’s pulled down to reveal some of her chest.  She is chained to her chair by her forearms and feet. The chains on her forearms are connected to twin power dampeners, much like the one she wears on her left arm in the current continuity.  Not a happy camper.  On the other side of the table is an empty chair.

MONEY MAN
Spy Gal.

aka Operative 13.

aka the Seductress of Syria,
the Bane of Bangkok,
the Ghost Girl of Georgia.

aka Vanessa Costa

SPY GAL
Claps for you.

You can read.

4- Money Man is now sitting across from Spy Gal, his folder placed neatly on the table.  I see this as a medium profile shot, but whatever works for you.

MONEY MAN
Tell me something
young lady, do you like
it here?  Are you
happy?

SPY GAL
Happy?

5 – Spy Gal leaning across the table as much as she can, presenting herself and her cleavage.  She’s turned the seduction on.  Might be nice to see this one from the Money Man’s perspective, over his shoulder or something.

SPY GAL
I know all about happy.
Get me out of here
and I’ll define it
for you.

What d’you say?

6 – Same as 4, but Spy Gal is a little more upset/disappointed now.

MONEY MAN
That will be quite enough
of that. I had hoped we could
do this without you resorting
to the cheap and
predictable.

You make me sad.

SPY GAL
…why is that?

6 – The Money Man speaking with sincerity. He’s really trying to reach out to Spy Gal and appeal to her better, hidden nature.

MONEY MAN
Miss Costa, you—
Yes, I can
and have read your file.
You don’t want the life
you lead any more than the
governments of six nations
want you to keep it.

I’m putting the most
marvelous team together.
A team of…heroes.

Have you ever thought
of being a hero?

7- Close on Spy Gal’s face as she looks up at the Money Man and smiles slyly.

 

Okay, now, a few thoughts.

1. The idea to put the credits in the ID badge for the second panel was entirely TL’s idea and it was friggin’ brilliant.  Love that.

2. You’ll see that some dialogue got shifted around, particularly in the last panel which was originally scripted as silent but that I felt worked best as you see it now with the last line from the previous panel brought over.

3. Spy Gal’s jumpsuit was scripted as gray and TL changed it to orange.  This was a good move.

4. The original inks that TL sent me had a couple of differences from what you see above, mostly having to do with Spy Gal.  In the original inks, Spy Gal’s clothing looked less like a baggy jumpsuit and more like leotards with a zipper.  Also, Spy Gal wasn’t quite as well-endowed in the original inks and while I’m normally loathe to sex things up, in this case it was warranted both by the script and by Spy Gal’s already established physique.  I believe the note went something like “20% more boob, please.”  As always, TL accommodated my ridiculousness.

Fact is, every page is like this.  We really do go into this kind of detail with things and TL is a true pro in the sense that he doesn’t even bat an eye when I kick back something for a minor change. Hope you guys are enjoying the results as much as I am.

NEW SUPERFOGEYS ORIGINS BEGINS NOW!

Welcome to the ground floor of another exciting SuperFogeys Origins.  I imagine that as we go along we’ll see more individual origins, but I thought it would be most interesting for now to continue (at least in part) the Money Man’s story and tell the origin of the Society of Heroes.

As you can see from the first page, you’re already getting some good tidbits about the origins of the characters you already know.  There’s what I hope are some good twists and surprises coming (including a couple guest stars that should drop some jaws), and all of it will be lavishly illustrated by one Mr. TL Collins.  Wait until you see some of these pages–WOW.

SEE YOU THIS THURSDAY FOR SUPERFOGEYS 196!